Weds 5th July 06 : One month 2 days post op

I went back to work today feeling nervous about the kind of reception I'd receive. It was fine (whew!) as work had been slow and one of the other assistants in the team had also been off ill. I had a fair amount of questions from various members of the group about what was wrong and I talked through it as best I could honestly. As I have ongoing problems with my eyes, no one raised their eyebrows too much and if anyone did, it may have been my imagination running a little wild. Even I do question sometimes when anyone calls in sick as to how genuinely sick they are - just a natural curiousity more than anything else though I say good for them :)

It was thankfully fairly low key today and I spent a fair amount of the morning on the phone calling up my insurance company as during the thunderstorms yesterday I discovered a leak in my back window (eek) and need to sort that out fairly fast - and cos I was on the phone, it gave me quiet time ie when people came in, they went straight to their desks and worked instead of stopping to talk to me cos I was on the phone - this was a relief (smiles) and was my intention as well as I didn't want to be the focus of attention like last week.

As Jane mentioned, my eyes are itchy (ergh) especially at the sides and felt dry even though I'd used lubricant and didn't use eye make up (sounds like I'm a car engine or something (grins).

Going back to the topic of months ago that people who felt sorry for me would flick at their eyes when they looked at my left eye lower lump, well today one of the other assistants kept flicking at her cheek (same side to mine mirror wise) ie my right is her left exactly where my infection is and acne. She kept rubbing it like she wanted to heal itc. It did bother me for a bit but I let it go - we were having a conversation and she kept doing that ie flicking at her left cheek and I just stopped mid conversation and got side tracked and had to really focus to get back on track again.

Then later she did it with her left eye (my right eyelid (lower) has a small lump on it) and she was flicking at exactly that same area. It's interesting :). And there are no such things as coincidences ! :)

My eyes didn't look too bad in the ladies which was a good thing cos my heart would have sunk. I had to have a tooth filling just before going home and the anaesthesia is just about wearing off and the ache and pain starting to be felt - ergh. I'm loathe to take painkillers and may just let it ache. He had to give me three extra shots of anaesthesia as I kept feeling the pain when he started drilling. I'm very sensitive.

All in all a good day today. No one noticed my eyes too much cos my fringe thankfully managed to cover up a lot them as did my glasses - even thou a couple of them tried to do a close up look to see this eye infection I was supposed to have had. I told them that I had vision problems as well which was true as my vision was blurry for days as well as hot' teary eyes which again was true as I had that too and that I needed to go to A&E which was true though I didn't say exactly why. I would have told them if asked further that it was re a stitch I'd found but no one asked further. I said to one of my bosses I was more than happy to spend half an hour discussing my eye ailments but that he'd most likely find it very boring! :)

Another 10 hour day and I'm feeling exhausted. I thought I'd get this down as if not, I'd never get it down. My eyes behaved today and I'm pleased. They did feel dry and tight at the ends and itchy but it was fine. My head from the endo brow lift still itches and is sore and I keep tapping the top of my head like I used to when I was wearing the wig - it's an automatic reaction. When I do rub my scalp, I can feel the incision lines and the grooves in my head - there are areas that feel lumpy.