3 weeks 4 days post op : Fri 30 June 06

Off sick today still - the two cysts on the side of my right cheek turned into some kind of infection and the whole of my right cheek has swollen up with two lumps on it - and it looks gross and hurts like crazy. Like I really need this on top of what is going on with my eyes.

Even thou I use Lacrilube, my eyes feel dry at night when I'm sleeping as I can feel my eyelids open ie not shut and any movement to blink is in slow motion and when I wake up, my vision is blurry for ages afterwards (could be the Lacrilube). I keep forgetting to use my steristrips to life my left lower retraction.

What I share in my blog is catharthic and healing for me and any and all emotions and thoughts are shared - that's what's so catharthic about it in that for me it is my own personal individual safe space to share anything and is a normal part of the healing process, from anger, tears, frustration, worry, hurt and laughter. The emotion is felt, expressed, released and healed and if not, the process is repeated as often as is needed to heal and catharthise. Emotions bottled in and supressed is unhealthy and eventually eats away at you inside and eventually comes out in the form of diseases eg cancer.

I feel ikky today and have done the past few days eye wise as they feel swollen and throb and at that itchy phase where I just want to rub my eyes; and they feel fat inside (grins). My vision is also affected and it's been almost a month now that I haven't worked out! Mostly mainly cos I needed to sort the house out as cos I work long hours paperwork just got piled up for ages in corners and now I've managed to have some sort of system though have a way to go yet. I need to get going on this though it's finding the motivation as my eyesight is so blurry it's difficult to do much as it's frustrating seeing everything blurred and glasses doh't help - ergh.